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Sunday, August 20, 2006

Myspace Migration: Ditto, Deodorant & Latex Housewives

Had a fantastic night last night. Girls night, party of 4, became Girls Night, party of two. Went to Simply Fondue - the only place I will EVER pay over $100 to cook my own meal. Had a blast - stuffed ourselves silly - gained a pound (which probably took up residence on my already over-sized butt, lol) - but it was worth it.

Besides, Jackie and I decided that we'll walk it off today at the mall. But, they had a fantastic bottle of Reisling (which I love) and I got my entertainment from her drunk-texting some of my friends with "Do ALL Guys Pee in the Shower??" I find this amusing because A) my friends now know it's her, not I, doing the texting - and they have fun with her and B) I'd like to know what they say back. DO all guys pee in the shower? We had one guy answer back, "Of course; it conserves water." Um, ok - never thought of it that way. Anyway, went to Eric's after I dropped Jackie off and listened to music until the wee hours of the morning. I LOVE music - it is interesting to see the differences in how we listen to music, though. He dissects the music as it's playing - I try to feel it. Neither is wrong, though - I enjoyed listening to the selections he chose - there were some somewhat obscure songs from great artists. Plus, I got to hang out in a giant bean-bag chair - always a bonus!
Ok, so have you noticed there are a shocking number of people who put on WHITE deodorant BEFORE they put on their black clothing?? I am a major proponent of wearing black - it's slimming, hides spills, creates great lines and looks commanding. However, I know (and this is one of those rare instances where common sense came inherently to me) to put my deodorant on after I've put on my shirt. Why? Because the white "I wore my deodorant today" lines you get if you don't just REALLY aren't attractive. And, call me crazy, but I think anyone over say ... I don't know... 16... should get that. There is a guy at the office though that nearly every time I see him has the deodorant lines on his shirt, though. Drives me bonkers as I'm sure he's close to 40. I'm sincerely mulling over the possibility of slipping a 3x5 instruction card on his desk or suggesting the clear stick, but I'm afraid that might come across as cruel. But then again, letting him continue to have the lines on his shirt is cruel, too... right?????

Ditto. Ditto. Ditto, ditto, ditto. I LOVE that word. Always have. Ghost threatened to ruin the word for me (and I guess did for many years); seriously, I think the first few times a guy answered "Ditto" in return for an "I Love You" that MIGHT be considered cute... after that, I'm pretty sure I'd either be thinking (or saying), "Say it back, you b-stard!" Anyway, I remember "Ditto" being en-vogue when I was in school, and that just totally ruined it. I can't be like everyone else, after all. But, it's a great word. So, this morning, as I'm texting someone, I realize that I just get tired of how long it takes to write a response back and decide to economize on words by replying with, "Ditto." OMG, I saved myself 12 words and 2 minutes! If I capitalized on this word and used it every time it was applicable, I'd probably end up with an extra hour in my day. With two kids, a busy practice, and attempting to jump start my love-life (or extreme lack thereof)... do you have any IDEA what I could do with an extra hour????

So last night, after I get home, I get ready for bed and turn on the TV. It's WAY late and although I'm tempted to turn on the TV, I told Eric I wouldn't watch a movie (I suffer from random bouts of insomnia and just got off a 2 week, no-sleep bender) and would get some sleep. And yes, Eric, I DID keep my word and did not watch TV. I decided to turn my television on to the music section... did you know you get music with Digital Cable? I love Cable... well, to get to the music section, you have to scroll down the PPV titles. Let me TELL you, I have never seen such colorful titles as the adult movie titles! I mean, who wouldn't want to watch "Latex Housewives" or "Shadows of a Geisha" or "Pimp My Wife?" They practically oooze entertainment - well, they ooze something anyway.. Seriously, though - it's PORN... who the heck cares what you call it. You'd get more people ordering it if you had little avatar sized pictures of the stars in their bathing suits or something on the info screen (which, as a parent, I think should only be able to be accessed after you've entered in a 4-digit code confirming you're either over 18 or your parents don't give a damn). I know I don't want to pay 19.95 for a movie I don't even know what the actors in it look like. Although, as I was discussing this with Tim this morning (my favorite gay friend and probably the only guy I would consider getting into in-depth discussions on stuff like this with), he said the money shots all look the same. He's probably right.

I do miss my laptop. It's just not the same. Sunday Mornings are supposed to occur with me sitting in bed, sipping coffee/tea, eating fruit and pounding out the pages on my laptop. I think I'm going to have it looked at, after all.

Ah well, off to the mall to Lush (www.lush.com since I don't know how to use the "insert link" function) and Sephora for more shimmer shadow (www.sephora.com Bare Escentuals "Shimmer" and Stila's "All Over Shimmer" are to die for; Dior's Gloss Show is a must have for every make-up bag, too). I really do NOT like malls and can't wait for the day my empire is large enough to justify a personal shopper... however, I console myself with the fact it's great for people watching. I'm sure I'll have plenty of fodder for writing later.

Let me just say that as much as I like Will Smith; I'm finding NO humor in the fact that it's 2 am and after two days of being able to sleep - I'm up watching Fresh Prince reruns. This is SO not fair.

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