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Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Myspace Migration: We Now Interrupt Your Regularly Scheduled Programming...

... to bring this one in. I am a cyclops. Or a one-eyed, one-horned, flying purple people eater - at least for today. So, I'm sitting in my office yesterday in a meeting with a team member (who is fantastic, I might add) and she asks, "What's up with your eye?" I, thinking I probably just smudged my eye makeup or something respond to that end and she says, "No, like it's seriously messed up - there might be something wrong in there - you need to look at it."
Nothing ever good comes from the phrase there might be something wrong in there. So, I pull out my compact and have a look. Oh.My.Goodness.Gracious - there's blood. Seeping down my eye. What.The.Heck?!
I learned something about myself yesterday - I am amazingly cool in a crisis; can deal with other people's crap marvelously. Evidently, this does not hold true when it involves Me. And.MY.EYE! Good grief, I was a nerd. My doctor, whom I've seen since I was four, is located in Hurst. I work in McKinney - first thought is, that's too far away. Need to find a closer doctor. But not the one I saw earlier today because the practice manager was very ...well, we'll just say she either had a bad day or owns a broomstick. My boss liked his Dr. What was his name? Dr. Gibson. Ok, cool. Becky probably has his number. He's close by. Let's do that.
Now, the entire time these thoughts are running through my head (and evidently out my mouth), my teammate is following me around trying to get me to go look at my eye in the bathroom. I? Am a rediculously lost duck. Finally, she got me to drop calling a new doctor and call my own - who told me I'm probably not having an anneurism or stroke. So, now I'm not as much panicking, but mother-of-pearl... my eye is starting to hurt.
Next stroke of genius: if you have a bleeding eye that's hurting... should you drive??
Yeah, well, I did. Without contacts, so bonus! Can't read the exit signs on the Tollway. And I broke my own rule and was replying to text messages to the person I called who I knew would crack jokes at me and keep me from psyching myself out thinking I'm about to go blind... I? Am a hot mess and lucky I'm not dead.
I love freestanding ERs. There is seriously No.Wait. But they have a new rule - they will not give you any medication that precludes you from driving until the person who WILL be driving you shows up. So, after the CAT scan, tetanus shot, antibiotics and toridal... I'm waiting for the people who are picking me up/my next shot and realize there's another bonus! I think I met my deductible..6 days into the new years. While yes, that sucks lemons - the rest of the year I'm going to rock that HSA.
By the way... I'm not going to die. I have a subsomething hemawhoosiewhat's it - basically, a blood vessel in my eye popped. Because I AM such a genius, I tried to see how far back the blood went and probably at that point, tore the pink stuff in the side of my eye (I really wasn't paying a whole lot of attention until he told me I didn't have high blood pressure and it wasn't an anneurism). I have antibiotic drops, will keep that eye closed for a day or two (basically, until it doesn't hurt to have it open) and it'll look killer for the next couple of weeks as gravity slides the blood down my eye. THAT will be attractive on dates, for sure!

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