Chip away at what makes you "YOU" and you become someone else...
Interesting sentiment. How often do we do that? Chip away at what we want, who we are, what believe... in service of something that we deem right, bigger than ourselves, or that we think we want?? It's been a long week, my friends. But that quote is very much on my mind. As is the book, "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day." Anyone read it - or read it to their kids? My week felt like that book. Just every time I turned around something else was going wrong - nothing was lining up. Work was just all kinds of a mess, my daughter was having issues in school, the guy I was casually dating apparently decided to be a boy and pulled out his inner "Richard" for my personal enjoyment (1), my housekeeper quit because she got a new job, my favorite pair of boots broke, can't find my new LBD anywhere, could have sworn I bought 6 new black camis in the last month but for some reason, I only have one; plus, I got sick. I could keep going, but; too much stuff in a week.
So, now how does that relate to the quote, right? I think, there's a point, where you let your circumstances chip away at you. Who you are gets set aside for the person you become while you're dealing with said mess. For me, I tend to get less tolerant; a lot more task-oriented and my defense walls? Go WAY up. A big part of what makes me 'ME' is my ability to see the silver linings in things. I'm typically a positive person, and I like that. Sure, some people call it bubbly, or think I've the personality of a perpetual cheerleader. I'm ok with that, because it helps me to enjoy life and I'd like to think it makes things a little brighter for the people around me. But last week? Was hard to see the sunshine. If you don't pay attention to it, that temporary personality becomes your new, permanent one.
It reminded me of when I was working at another company. Wasn't the Company's fault, persay, but the timing around when I went to work there was off. Seemed like I was thrown into one crazy situation after another and had to deal with a LOT of hard, unpleasant things. It changed me. Because I let it. It took a lot of time before I realized it, though. And it was a lot of work to get me back to who I was before I went there. Before that, I had never thought that your surroundings could change who you are at the core - I wasn't an 'environmentalist' in that way. I guess, in a way, the surroundings can't. You do - We do - in how we choose to deal with it. That's not the plan for us, though - in the world, but not of it?
Anyway, I don't know where I was going with any of this, except to say that this week was a doozy and it reminded me of before. I guess I'm growing, though, because this week I saw it coming and was more or less able to deal with it - only took the weekend to get me back to my fun-loving, klutzy, positive self! That's progress, right?? Ok, since I bruised my tailbone and kinda hurt wrist with my latest and greatest display of my utter lack of coordination, I suspect it will take much longer to get ready for church today. I should get back to it. Enjoy your day, folks - and watch out for the circumstances trying to chip away at you. ;)
(1) read: irritation, mortification, frustration - the antithesis of enjoyment